The Next Best Thing

Hidden meaning...deception, a sideways glance....what does it all mean? Today was a shit day in many ways....but also an opportunity to learn. I was presented with an ultimatum today...an ultimatum from someone who believes they hold some sort of power over me, based on deceptive, sideways, twisted facts. I dislike being put in this sort of position in life...but I also think it provides an opportunity to learn...to grow.

So I went to a function tonight and for the first time in many years I was looking around...over the shoulder of the person I was engaging in conversation..scanning the room to see "who" was there....leaving one conversation to start another. I normally am not so "flighty" but instead, remain very engaged with the person I am talking with...empathetic and attentive...but not tonight, tonight was about seeking out opportunity, and speaking my truth.

It may sound weird/funny...but after this function, I attended a second event...we went to another Vancouver Film Fest show called Guido Superstar, an absolutely ridiculous local "gangster" flick, which got lots of chuckles if nothing else. A cast of nice looking dudes with a silly story. I simply could not believe Silvio Pollio in this role (not that I have seen him in anything else) because he is pretty hot, with a studly bod, playing a dumb innocent, cow milking, sweet man from Italy...no matter what the guy did...he is just too good looking in real life to pull this off...but he did do a damn good job trying.

So anyway...after the show, all of the actors are milling around, chatting with one another, and we are saying our hellos and congrats as they all look over my shoulder for the next person to chat with...they look over Ivan's shoulder...they look over each others shoulders. This used to bug me immensely in the acting community...trying to chat with someone as they look over your shoulder...searching for "someone else" ....this bugged me, until tonight, when earlier on, I was doing that very same thing.

I guess it purely depends on your motivation....looking for "the next best thing."